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PEOPLE WITH SPINAL CORD INJURY AND THEIR FAMILIES: SIBLING PERSPECTIVE
Bailey's sister Joan was four years his senior. Despite normal sibling teasing and competition, she'd always "looked out" for him. He admired loan. She was a good athlete and artist, and Bailey and his family never doubted that when she left college she'd be successful in every way.
Bailey arrived home one day during his sophomore year of high school to find his parents in their room, weeping. A suitcase was sitting on the bed. Bailey had never seen his father cry before, and his first thought was that Joan had died. His parents told him that loan had fallen from her dormitory balcony and was in the hospital, unconscious.
What followed was so tangled in intense emotion that it is somewhat jumbled in Bailey's memory. Not knowing exactly what had occurred, Bailey had only the notion that it was something terrible. He was startled by his parents' rare display of emotion and unsettled by the discovery of their vulnerability. Bailey recalls that being a brother helped him to be tougher. He remembers thinking, "We'll get through this."
His parents went alone for the initial trip to the hospital, but told Bailey everything they had learned about loan's injury, which had resulted in incomplete quadriplegia. They didn't "sugar coat" it for Bailey, and their ability to face events squarely gave him confidence. He describes the whole family as having an unspoken understanding that they would be strong and get through the crisis, and that the accident wouldn't change them.
Sibling relationships, which endure over a greater span of time than any other family relationship, are important developmentally, emotionally, and socially. They can be important sources of support and companionship. And although they can be strained by competition and jealousy, sibling relationships are strengthened by shared experiences, intimacy, and cooperation.
When a person experiences a life-changing event such as spinal cord injury, the impact on siblings is significant and lasting, as Bailey's story shows.
*91/156/5*
HEALTHY BONES
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